i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.