If that was your dad, he is hot
you didnt know i had herpes?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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