i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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