At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize