??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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