I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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