Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
