do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Someone signed my nipple.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
