Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
