my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
pray to the hookup gods
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
