Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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