i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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