so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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