i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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