Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
