I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
where does the pee come out of this thing
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
