I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
id be glad to
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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