There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
