Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I look excited, but its just a facade.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
