Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
