I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.