The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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