Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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