Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
