is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
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I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
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Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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