Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
