idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
