I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
