You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
