I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
