I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I cannot find my penis.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
