drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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