we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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