"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize