dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize
