I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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