Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
