I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
ttyl tear gas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize