do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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