new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
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