I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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