its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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