Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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