So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
