no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
