i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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