the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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