I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
