I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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