he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
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