i don't like sucking hair
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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