dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
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Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
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GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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