I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
