Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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