Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
