if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
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he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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