I'm gonna have a badass scar
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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